Running up that hill





Life feels a bit fragile at the moment. My father is noticeably more tired now, during his chemo treatments and I am concerned. He was diagnosed with cancer this summer in the bowel and liver. On monday he will have the first of two operations and I´m so nervous. My whole heart wishes that he will fix this. I am not prepared to say goodbye now. It is far too early. He is only 60 years old and still working. We have in recent years found each other, on one of those nice way. We can sit and talk about everything over a cup of coffee and hours can go. These moments are the best things I know.

Day 10 – Something that upsets you

There are obvious things that makes me upset. I think of big things like war, injustice, abuse of power and violence in all forms, especially the vulnerable such as children and animals. But if I concentrate on the personal level, there's something I really hate like the plague. What I think of is envy.

Envy is mentioned as one of the seven deadly sins. It's really not so surprising that many of mankind horrible actions often are rooted in envy of all kinds. You probably agree with me on that. But - when it comes to the personal level, I think probably all of us have ever suffered from envy or jealousy. I have sometimes suffered from streaks of it and it gives and does not create any positive feelings or bring any happiness in life. On the contrary, the more you caves down in this you more unhappier you become.

"There is a special place in hell for women who do not help each other."

 - The winged words are Madeleine Albrights America's first female foreign minister. One can only hope she is right. One can also hope for the opposite. A special place in heaven for women who help each other would be, the more pleasant.

I myself have been involved in female co-workers or friends felt threatened by me. Why me, I do not really understand. Most of them who really knows me, knows that I'd rather be in the background and hates to be seen and heard too much. I am quite shy of me, especially when it comes to unfamiliar social situations or new people.

On one occasion I was hired with another girl to the same job that was initially only ment for one person. The boss said with a little teasing tone that we could compete with each other. I took it all with calm. If it wasen´t for the other girl who took it all very or too much seriously. She drove the whole range of dirty tricks and as soon as I had success with things you more green with envy, she was. It ended sadly when I gave up because I could not handle her. Now I was very young at the time and if it have been today I would probably have stayed and given her a real fight.When it comes to love relationships, there is no relationship more destroying than jealousy. Being jealous of your boyfriends female friends is a classic trap. And - yes, I have been in the degrading situation myself. But I have because of my experience, decided to stop thinking so negatively about myself and others. For what I send out will return to me. I send out love and positive thoughts about myself and I'll reap the rewards of that too.

Day 06 – Your best friend

Soulmate is probably a better word for best friend. Or why not in Swedish, twin soul. Someone who understands what you say before you even said so. Someone who comforts you when you need it. Someone who says you will do just as you are. Someone to laugh with when life feels like hell.

I have been wondering for a couple of days on my best friend. It has really evolved over who is my best friend. Had you asked me when I was nine years old with braces, I had told Linda E because she was so kind and sweet. Would you have asked me when I was nineteen, I'd say, Karen. This crazy Icelandic girl who was my complete opposite, loud, impulsive and redhead. If you asked me like that eight years ago, I probably answered my husband as I was then married, and this summer I had no doubt mention my dog ​​Charlie as my best friend. In other words, it has varied over the years.

Today I have learned one thing and that is to be glued to those who may concern, proving, lift me up. I collect people who do not disappear even when the wind is blowing. They are the ones who remains that means everything. When I was a bit lost in life for a few years ago, a male friend stodd by my side, that means a lot to me. Although we are very different so there he remained with me and listened to me many tear-drenched nights through. I am so grateful for him and he keeps me hard in.

There are also a handful of friends around me that I hold dear. The wonderful thing about them is enough that you can always call and talk to or meet at any time. and then no debt-laden issues - Well, that was indeed long time since we heard from you .. etc.

Since next year will mean a lot of changes in my life when I start a new job and hopefully in the course in Stockholm next fall so I'm looking forward to seeing more exciting new people and forge new ties as well as revisit some old contacts there up.

Day 05 – Your definition of love

Love from family, friends and animals means a lot to me. It is like the glue that holds together everything in life. The romantic love of a man not only makes me rosy cheeked but also harmonious. But the harmony of myself does not stand or fall in the absence of a romantic love relationship.

Day 03 – Your parents

My father was born in 1951 and works at Sweden's largest bank Nordea. My mother, born a year after my father, is a nurse. They both mean a lot to me and I have a very good and close relationship with them.


Mom and dad were born and raised in Gothenburg in Sweden. For about six years ago they bought a house in the country after many years in the big city. They love it there even though it means two hours of commuting to and from work every day. Mom has her horse boarded at the neighbor across the road which she thinks is wonderful. To ride and care for her horse is the best she knows. Dad has a great interest in music, especially classical music. In younger years he played piano for a professor and had dreams to become a professional pianist. But then came another in the way but he kept the piano-playing on a hobby instead. I remember very well all the times he played at weddings and funerals during my childhood. Today he is busy working and taking care of the house and the large garden of 4000 sqm.


Mom and dad met for the very first time in the early 1970's. My mom was married at the time but after a few years they became a couple and married 1975. Dad quickly noticed mom and quickly became fond of her. Mom remembers so well that she took a liking to my father after a while. He had a wonderful twinkle in his eyes. 1977 I was born and 15 months later my little sister.


When I was five, so mom opened a fabric store with a friend. Her friend also had children in exactly the same age as me and my sister. So every other day mom was working in the shop and then took her friend care for all of us children. And so they took turns on. Mom has always had a keen interest in fashion and fabric store went out really good. They also sewed up some pieces and sold. After five years her friend became pregnant with a third child and wanted to wind down and stop. Mom and she chose to sell it instead. She saddled and worked as a childminder for a few years ago to study further to become a nurse.


My parents are not perfect. There are obviously some things that they might now want to do again. My dad for example should had been a little more with us children when we were young. But I think most parents feel that. But I think today they really did their best given certain circumstances. I've always been a bit of a daddy's girl while my little sister suggested a lot to om. In adolescence, it squeaked a bit between me and mom but there are things that are forgotten today. We have talked about the difficult things and moved on. It is most important. That you can talk about the difficult things that might weigh one's heart, it is extremely important. Life is sometimes like a rollercoaster. In tough times, assistance from family, the finest available.


We traveled a lot during my childhood. I have wonderful memories of the very first overseas trip to Portugal, where I also learned how to swim. Excitement of big cities such as Barcelona, ​​Vienna, Paris and London. Thanks Mom & Dad for being there! I love you with all my ♥