Tuesday, 16 August 2011

About being single

You know all those movies about single girls in their 30s who hunt for the perfect career and the perfect man? Those kinds of movies that are fun to watch from a distance, but no one really wants to live in? Well, I'm in it. Though there are not as many brunches with perfect dressed girlfriends with successful careers, not as much money for extravagant shopping adventures, and not as many proposers (in the movies, there are always two, preferably one good and one bad, and at least one of them played by Hugh Grant).

I have many friends in my age. It's just that most people do not play in the same film. A while ago they switched the channel and now is the American family sitcoms with a laugh machine which lightens the mood, every four minutes. I sit a bit confused still with the remote in my hand and I slowly realize that they have gone to the other side of the screen, living the life I can only look at the glow of a flat screen. For they have done as you should, in real life. They have moved on. They have secured a steady job and a secure income. Fished up a partner. Possibly multiplied by the same. Determined to be us rather than me and myself.

Friendship's sort of by definition, secondary to the love. Not unimportant, but secondary. They found a higher purpose. It is always fascinating and compelling to watch. Just as the phenomenon of people who have children and explain that it is now life begins. Before the children they had nothing. And it does not matter how many movies about SATC Manolo heels in the desert to produce, for in reality, the single life no higher status than a couple entered cheap shoes from Wal-Mart.
Are you in marriage age and somehow still single there is a huge risk that we-people gets easily uncomfortable. If this perversion of the human family could get together and go into life, part two. So you did not have to feel guilty when you have other commitments and priorities that singles does not understand.

In defense you are lying about how good it is to be on your own. You try to make solitude to a status concept. And every single biological clock is still ticking ... No stress, they say. And yet it is just glass facades that threatens to crush from everyday asphalt. For the hand of the lonely heart it is a fact of life that most of us just want to be a part of just one of those couples who have other priorities. Which is perhaps a little jealous of the unbound single life, but at the end of the day they still are content to not be one of the lost souls. Who can see things clearly and at a safe distance from the pillow on the relative pedestal.

 Who can get his life served with laughter intervals every four minutes.

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